The Weekend Recap

This last weekend was pretty fun. On Friday night we had a few friends over for dinner. The boyfriend made a mountain of ribs (we are still eating them and its Tuesday) and some good ass food. I ended up "making" dessert (which consisted of me throwing a pie in the oven and proceeding to burn it). It was a really fun dinner. We had MTV Jams on in the background and we watched it throughout dinner. They had this show on called YO! RAPS! and it had a ton of brutal 90s rap on it. We discussed the wonders that were parachute pants and flatops.

Then I was just about to head to bed when both mine and the boyfriends cell phones erupted in a series of trills. I answered mine and he answered his and it was our two friends. Little did we know they were standing at our window and wanted to come in to play American Idol on Wii. So alas, we played it. Our one friend was super drunk and he can't sing to save his life. He was singing in a sort of hunched-over position and he ended up splitting a hole in his pants. So when the song "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" by Aerosmith came up (you know the one from the Armageddon soundtrack) he replaced the words with "I Don't want to Split my Pants". It was hilarious.

We then proceeded to have a competition (i.e. with one person getting knocked out at each round with the Simon-Paula-Randy comments and everything). I heard the boyfriend sing for the first time ever (he is tone deaf to the max). I think that the bad-singing-split-pants friend was so bad it gave the boyfriend some confidence. The boyfriend got knocked out of the first round and then when the second round came, the guy who had split his pants was so shocked when he got knocked out. He looked like someone had told him that they had to amputate his penis or something! It was great! Anyways they finally left and I got to go to bed.

On Saturday morning, I woke up early to go to a hair appointment. My hair is in dire need of a dyeing but alas I will have to wait for another couple of weeks. The hairdresser that I went to was sick that week and couldn't fit me in for another two weeks. She seems a bit nuts. My client told me a story about her a couple of weeks ago. In Bermuda there are tons of stray cats kicking around and they are a menace and have diseases such as cat AIDS (I had no idea there is such a thing). So there is an agency called the Bermuda Feline Assistance Agency which goes around and catches and kills the cats. Kind of mean but I guess what can you do. So they have a few stray cats on this property my client manages and they rip up garbage and stuff and they are dirty, dirty cats. So instead of ignoring them or calling BFAB, this lady started feeding them. Oh well, apparently she is supposed to be wicked at coloring hair!!!! As long as she cleans her hands first!

That night I got all dressed up and went to the Elbow Beach Hotel for our convocation ceremony. I thought it was weird that they included us in the ceremony as I took my exam in Canada but the ceremony would've been very lame if they didn't include the off island graduates as only one Bermudian passed the Chartered Accountancy exam this last year out of the four that wrote the exam. Craziness! I can't believe that more people don't make it through because if you have your CA designation here, you are sitting on a goldmine. But I guess it goes back to the lack of value the youth of Bermuda have for education (read my last post regarding the drop-out rate from high school). I got drunk off of the table wine and then busted a massive move on the dancefloor. I got the DJ to play Soldier Boy (as I always do) and then did the soldier boy dance.

After the convocation dinner and dance, I went to my friends housewarming party and played Rock Band. I sang for a bit and then moved on to the drums. The drums are frickin' hard. Seriously. I was on easy and I was struggling majorly! I think everyone kept their shirts on that night....so that was a first!

Yesterday one of the partners at my firm gave me and the boyfriend tickets to the Bermuda XL Open round 1 tennis match. They were box seats and came with free drinks! So I ended up getting impromptu drunk (which is something I usually avoid like the plague because I can't handle the hangover at work and also it is counterproductive to waking up and going to the gym in the morning). I think I only had like 4 or 5 drinks but they pour them so strong here. I haven't seen any bartender do anything other than free-pour since getting here! I kind of remember having a conversation with my co-workers involving fingers and butt-holes and I remember drunkin calling my sister at her work (Canada is 3 hours earlier in time than Bermuda). I also made the boyfriend make me quasadillas and crackers and cheese when I got home! Needless to say, I didn't make it to the gym this morning and I had a major headache all day! That'll teach me not to drink on a weeknight again anytime soon!