First, on Monday night, at 1am, I awoke to a loud beeping sound. It took me about 5 minutes to figure out that no, I did not cause this sound. I was so confused that I spent about 2 minutes trying to turn off my alarm (which I finally figured out was set for 6:30am) and then about 2 minutes trying to figure out that my heater wasn't making that sound (yes I have great deductioning logic at 1am). So I poke my head out of the door and I see smoke. I am like oh my god I am going to die. So I do what any logical person would do, I grabbed my pair of Citizen of Humanity Jeans and put them on and ensured that all my new clothes that I just bought were in a bag. Then I placed my work computer as close I could to the door (I wanted that son of a bitch to burn, burn, burn, so I would have an excuse to stop working). I then made sure that I had my camera and other important items like my passport. This took me about 5 minutes. Then I was out the door. It turned out it was the heater in the hall (closest to my room) that apparently hadn't been turned on for months that had started to smoke. I learnt an important lesson about myself...apparently I value clothes more than my own life. I am so sad. In ten minutes, with the proximity of that heater to my room, I would have surely perished, had it actually caught on fire. But damn I would be one hot charred body (my new Citizen jeans and all).
But no the Holiday Inn fun does not stop there! On Tuesday night, the hot water stopped working. So they get someone in to fix it on Wednesday. On Wednesday night I get a letter under my door that apologizes but the valve that needs to be replaced for the hot water to work needs to be flown in and will be there in the morning. This is an exact quote from the letter: "The good news is that the cold water is still working." Wow thanks holiday inn, I am so happy that we have not reverted to third world status, sans running water, as one expects when paying $125 US a night for a crappy room.
So, you ask, what else could go wrong. Well I come back to my room last night (Thursday) and I get a another note under my door that says that, hoorah, the hot water is back, but that the only way to know for sure is to test it out. I'm like....oh thank god a hot shower. Then I scan to the bottom of the letter and there is a lovely post script. It says: Oh by the way our T-1 phone lines are not working and that they have been working on it all day. This normally wouldn't be that big of a deal, but I had just left the client site at 8pm (even though I had like 2 more hours of work to do) in hopes that I could just curl up in my pajamas and do some work back at the hotel because I had spent 12-13 hours a day sitting in the same office out at the client site that week. But alas, I needed internet access for the work I needed to do. At this point I just said "Meh" I guess that is what is to be expected. So this morning, when I went to check out of my hotel, I complained and they offered me 25% off of my room. How does that help me though? My company pays for my hotel...so thanks for putting some more money in the partners pockets. So I made them give me some extra hotel points. Maybe I can get enough to stay at another crappy Holiday Inn. One can only hope.
Well the rest of the trip was decent (other than the long-ass days of work). We (as in me and my co-worker) spent the weekend in downtown Houston and stayed at the cutest little boutique hotel called the Hotel Derek that was right by the Houston Galleria mall. Let me tell you that mall was the highlight of my trip. I love it! So many nice stores. I didn't bother going in the Coach, Versace, etc because the sales people didn't appreciate my $15 Target-bought shoes. So I stuck to the Nordstroms, Macy's, Fossils, etc. I managed to buy a new watch, some new Citizen of Humanity jeans (which I am currently in love with) and some shirts. We also ate at this wicked restaurant called the Cheesecake Factory and at the best freakin cheesecake and appetizers I have ever had. I had a chocolate chip cookie dough-peanut-butter cheeescake and fried macaroni and cheese balls (yumm!) I had all these brilliant plans to eat at all these amazing places downtown but after that massive lunch, I couldn't bring myself to eat anything for like 24 hours.
(This is a picture of me and my new boyfriend....just kidding, he was an Abercrombie and Fitch model that was at the Galleria)
That night we went to a bar called Rich's. We went there because my co-worker is gay and I was up for going to a gay bar (hey why not!) I can play the "Fag Hag" as he put it! We got there and the place was completely empty. I kept looking around the bar and noting that there seemed to be an awful lot of girls dancing with guys at that bar. So in a couple of hours, people start showing up and my co-worker saw some cute guys who turned out to be twins so he went and spoke to them. So I came over and spoke to them too and my co-worker thought they were cute. I had to break the news to him that I think that they weren't gay because they kept coming up and talking to me first and then him. One of the twins explained that the bar used to be a gay bar but now it has turned into an after-hours club. But since we had taken a $20 cab ride to the bar, we decided to stay.
We ended up meeting these two girls and dancing with them all night. Some highlights of the night is when I danced with this 6'5 drag queen and when I went up to this guy, who had just finished this wicked break dancing set in a circle, that had formed on the dancefloor, and I challenged him to a robot-off (FYI in case you have ever seen my robot....it's probably the worst robot in existence). My robot looks like if Elaine from Seinfeld attempted to do the robot. Jerky movements, not so robot-like. Needless to say "He got SERVED!"
We ended up meeting these two girls and dancing with them all night. Some highlights of the night is when I danced with this 6'5 drag queen and when I went up to this guy, who had just finished this wicked break dancing set in a circle, that had formed on the dancefloor, and I challenged him to a robot-off (FYI in case you have ever seen my robot....it's probably the worst robot in existence). My robot looks like if Elaine from Seinfeld attempted to do the robot. Jerky movements, not so robot-like. Needless to say "He got SERVED!"
(This is a pic of me, the co-worker and one of the random gals we met at Rich's).
Other than that, the trip was pretty uneventful. I ate alot of food and learnt to ask for half-portions (explaining why there are alot of "glandurally-challenged" people in Houston"). Also, the weather was nice up until the day we got to Houston (it rained so much and there was even frost one day) and then got nice the day we left. So that kind of was a bummer!
So last story to leave you with is the lovely surprise when I checked my voicemail last night. I had 3 messages from a crazy East-Indian lady who claimed that I am shacked up with her ex-husband. She kept saying that all she wanted to do was talk to her son and kept telling me that her ex-husband is crap in bed. She left her phone number and I am debating calling her and telling her that she has the wrong number but she seemed pretty loco. I am scared she make think that I am lying and that I am in fact sleeping with her ex-husband. A conundrum. I'm heading home though people and I can't wait (there's someone there I miss alot!!!)
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